Sell everything and buy Wisdom! Forage for Understanding!

    Don’t forget one word! Don’t deviate an inch!

Never walk away from Wisdom—she guards your life;



love her—she keeps her eye on you.

Above all and before all, do this: Get Wisdom!

    Write this at the top of your list: Get Understanding!

Throw your arms around her—believe me, you won’t regret it;

    never let her go—she’ll make your life glorious.

She’ll garland your life with grace,

    she’ll festoon your days with beauty.”

https://www.intentionalkingdomliving.com/250/

Today, my beloved youngest and I had a throw down.

Well, actually we sat in the parking lot of his soon-to-be-preschool and waited 20 looooong minutes to get him to buckle his seatbelt on his own.

Here’s the thing: He knows what he needs to do.  He knows step one, step two, step three, aannnd buckle! 

But he wasn’t doing it.  First he said he didn’t know how.  I said, “Yes, you do.  We’ve been practicing for a week.”

Then he said he needed help.  So I started to reach to help.  He didn’t want that.

Then I said I would talk him through it.  He started crying louder.  (To be exact, he had been crying/whining this whole time.)

So I stopped talking him through it and turned around and listened to the radio.

He kept crying.

He accused me of “never helping him.” 

Truth be told, I was so stinking annoyed at him.

I wanted to tell him I had tried!  He hadn’t wanted it.  Then he had wanted it.  He’s so confusing!

But I (believe it or not) didn’t rail on him.  I simply said, “I will help you if you need help.  But you need to ask nicely.”

He did.

I helped.  It didn’t work perfectly the very first time, so he let go of the belt, letting it retract back and wailing about how he can’t do it.

Finally I said, “You can do it.  You’re choosing not to.  I will help if you want, but we are going to sit here until you do it.”

Guess what?  He did it. 

Two things:

1.  He didn’t do my step 1, step 2, step 3 method.  He pulled all the way down first, then scooted the buckle all the way to the holder.  It was a good idea.

2.  We sat there way too long while he apathetically “tried” to get the buckle to go in.  First he wasn’t even looking.  Then he looked but weakly slapped it against the holder.  Finally, after I looked away – but still helped him hold it so it wouldn’t retract again – he slid it in.

I cheered.  Way too much.  That made him fuss louder.  He didn’t want a parade.  He didn’t want a cheerleader.   He just wanted someone near enough to help when he needed it, to stand back and make him do it himself when he didn’t need it, and to acknowledge the effort in a low key way when he accomplished it.

One more thing?  On the way home he found other things to accuse me of.  Other reasons why I had done something wrong or said it not the right way.  How frustrating!

The worst part was how much of myself I saw in those blue eyes. 

I am the Queen of I want this/I don’t want this. 

Move closely, pull away.  Have a deep connection one time, then knee-jerk backward the next in fear.  Whine that no one will help me or I can’t do it, then resent advice or help or even encouragement.

Bleh.

God wants me to write.  I think He wants me to share it with others.  I don’t want a parade.  I definitely don’t want to be put on a pedestal. 

But I want to help others put words to their fear or pride or anger or whining.

I want to know someone is there for (low-key) encouragement when I need it and to back off when I don’t.

I want others to (kindly and in love) call me out when I’m whining and accusing instead of working and trying.

I want people to directly ask me if they have a question about what I believe or how I feel instead of assuming.

And I want those same people to hold me up to the same standard: don’t assume, just ask.

I want people to not expect me to be able to be there for them in a way I’m only emotionally capable of being with a select few.  But to receive what I have to give when I can give it.

I want to take my fear and shame and smash them publicly in the hopes that it will encourage others to do it, too, with whatever their strongholds are.

And I want God to be made famous through it all. 

Because He has told me we’re gonna sit here until I do.

https://www.intentionalkingdomliving.com/251/

Dan and I have made a deal.

Well, let me back up.

I started blogging five years ago at the insistence of my sister.  Back then, life was far from perfect.  But it was very simple.  When I look back I just sigh at the wide expanses my soul wandered back then.

But life, as they say, changes.

Add a second child.  A mortgage.  More classes to teach.  A husband’s academic and career dreams to support.  A ministry and more friends to serve.  A school-age child’s activities to engage.  More kids’ friendships to help coordinate.  A wider community. 

All. good. stuff.

But sometimes…

We’ve been thinking through what the next phase of life is for us.  Most likely it will involve a career shift for my man.  And in two short years, both my children will be in school full-time.  So we’ve been thinking through what’s next for me.  What are the passions God’s given me?  How do I want to intentionally spend my time Monday through Friday, 9 to 4 soon?

There are several options:

Get more certifications and teach more classes or train more individuals.  But that likely will involve running around town even more and sometimes missing things like field trips. 

Get an office job.  But that makes me want to cry.

Or I can pursue my dream of writing.

Yes.  That one.

It will free me up to go on those field trips.  To engage in ministry.  To have lazy, after-school play dates.  To work my schedule around my family and community.

And, praise Jesus, we live in a time where that can happen.

But the deal with my man is this: If I’m going to spend a large amount of time and energy on this, it needs to generate some income. 

So, here we are.  I’m leaving my sweet little organic blog.  I’m going to have a professional help me set one up that allows people to advertise.  I’m going to remind myself that people do this all the time and it doesn’t make me a sell-out.  Or maybe it does, but I’m gonna go for it. 

I’m going to put myself out there.

What I love about God is He insists on us relying on Him.  Not because He’s co-dependent with us.  Thank goodness.

But because He wants us to be satisfied in Him.  And let our lives bear fruit that could only be explained by Him and His involvement.  And because without faith it is impossible to please Him.

And because He said so.

And every time He says so, it is for our good, not suppression.

Anyway, we’re fairly confident this is the path for our family to begin pursuing.  If we’re wrong, we’ll tweak or start over.  But we won’t stop seeking Him.  Or the simplicity that having single eyes will give us.

Thank you if you’ve read even one post on this blog.  I hope you’ll join us at the new one (still in the works, but we’ll be sure to keep you updated). 

Thank you for being part of a training process God designed for us before we took the next step.

We didn’t even know what He was up to.

And now that we see a tiny glimpse, we only love Him more.

https://www.intentionalkingdomliving.com/279/

Well, here we are.  Spending Fast is in the books. 

It was a nice time to really refocus on our finances.  I was interested in an article I saw on a blog called “When a Spender and a Saver Marry” thinking I was one or the other. 

But the truth is, Dan and I are both Spenders.  It’s just different.  I can nickel-and-dime us to death on little things.  He likes quality things, so when he does something, he goes big. 

So what to do when a Spender and a Spender marry?

Have regular checks on stuff, I guess.

Friends, this fast wasn’t even that hard.  Which is hard.  You know?  Think of how much more intentional I can be – without it really even pinching – and how much Good in which we could invest money.

It was a good check for me when I just wanted to grab something quickly.  I didn’t even have to plan that much more; just make sure I had an orange or sandwich or apple or pretzels for Caleb when we left and I wasn’t sure if we’d be back before he got hungry.

I had been making Caden pack his own school lunch and ended up packing it for him a few times out of guilt that I was making him do it all the way to the end of school.  But he didn’t seem to care too much. 

On that note, I would like to say that the boys did absolutely fine.  I truly need to stop blaming them for things like this.  They would ask, I would remind them we’re not buying extra treats, we would pop popcorn or something when we got home and it wasn’t a huge deal.  Forgive me, boys.  You’re more mature than Mama.

Garage Sales were a big temptation.  I saw one of those large, well-made signs that spoke of an area-wide sale last week.  And it was in a nice neighborhood.  Which means – let’s be honest – nicer stuff.  But I just said, “Get thee behind me, satan” and drove on.  Win!

Home Accessories and Clothing?  Meh.  No biggie.  First, we’ve weeded through our closets this spring and I’ve been well aware of how much I already have.  Also, I think I mentioned a friend gave me some jeans.  That was fun.  Just watching Him shower me in love in a different way.  Community is one big answer to spending less.  We don’t all have to go buy the same stuff.  Let’s share! 

Looking back I think I should’ve included a media limit as well during all this.  I think a few times I hopped on Pinterest or Facebook a little more, just transferring my entitlement issues to a different outlet. 

But not every time.  Most of the time I went to my God and asked Him to come through.  He did beautifully, as always.  I love how when we take Him up on His Word, He delights to prove Himself faithful.

One of my favorite quotes from Jen’s wrap-up on her Spending Fast Month I cannot relate to:

“We put a chunk of money into adoption savings and gave a few hundred away, because guess what?  When you don’t spend money, you have more at the end of the month.  This financial wizardry is brought to you free of charge.”

See, we didn’t have a bunch of money left over.  Which is fine.  It just points out how we have a budget for a reason.  And we need to live within it. 

I think that’s my biggest take-away.  Intentional planning = Kingdom Living. 

It’s totally doable.  I can take a few extra brain cells and minutes in the morning to plan well for stuff (mostly lunches and snacks) and make sure I have a plan for dinners.  If I do, we can do a lot of Good Stuff with the extra.  (Eating Out and Treats = our biggest Budget Busters.)

Oh!  Another thing that I didn’t account for (and we went ahead and spent the money on) was Gifts.  We had a birthday party, graduations, and a few other situations.  I have a friend who is even intentional in this area.  When she sees something kid-related marked down, she’ll snatch it up (she has a little wiggle room in her budget for this).  Then she keeps a tub of gifts and selects the right one for each occasion.  (Come to think of it, I think she does this with “adult” gifts as well – candles and things.)  That way, even if she’s having a lean month she still can be generous with her loved ones. 

Another thing I’ve thought a lot about as I’ve refreshed my mind with some of these money quotes is savings.  When I stop to think about it, do I really think that – if I’m intentional about investing my money in others and the Kingdom – God is going to let me fall on my face if I don’t have “enough” savings?  I just don’t think so.  That’s not His character.  Or what His Word says.  Rather, it’s a really wonderful way for Him to show up.  Provide differently.  And obviously.  So others see His glory.

A while back, a quote in our group’s study caught my attention:

“If there is anything about me that is communicating to others that I am above them and not right in the middle of them, something is horribly wrong.”

That is my heart.  I wanted to make sure and say why I often share mess-ups on here.  It is not for pity or because I think God is disappointed in me.  It’s just that I never want to come across as having it all together.  It’s very important to me.

But last week at group one of my girls had some wisdom.  She goes, “I’m very quick, in the name of vulnerability, to share where I struggle or what’s not going well.  But when I hear of a young mom having success in patience or something, it can be really encouraging.  So I want to appropriately share successes when they are in the right context.”

Friends, I think this was a success.  And I enjoyed the “accountability” of sharing it with you.  When money isn’t the first thing I go to to meet needs and wants, God and people come through. 

Just like He designed it. 

Simplicity really is delightful.

Pencil marks on a wall
                   
I wasn’t always this tall
                   
You scattered some monsters from beneath my bed
                   
You watched my team win
                   
You watched my team lose
                   
You watched when my bicycle went down again




And when I was weak

Unable to speak
                   
Still I could call You by name
                   
And I said, 


“Elbow-Healer

Superhero
                   
Come if You can.”



And You said, “I Am”




Only 16

Life is so mean

What kind of curfew is at 10 pm?
                   
You saw my mistakes

You watched my heart break
                   
Heard when I swore I’d never love again



When I was weak

Unable to speak
                   
Still I could call You by name
                   
And I said,



“Heartache-Healer

Secret-Keeper
                   
Be my Best Friend”




And You said, “I Am”




You saw me wear white

By pale candlelight
                   
I said forever to what lies ahead
                   
Two kids and a dream

With kids that can scream
                   
Too much it might seem when it’s 2 am 




When I am weak

Unable to speak
                   
Still I will call You by name


“Oh Shepherd

Savior

Pasture-Maker

                   
Hold on to my hand”



And You say “I Am”




The winds of change                    
                   
And circumstance blow in and all around us

So we find a foothold that’s familiar
                   
And bless the moments that we feel You nearer 

                   
Life had begun

I was woven and spun
                   
You let the angels dance around the throne



Who can say when                   
                   
But they’ll dance again

When I am free

And finally headed Home

I will be weak

Unable to speak
                   
Still I will call You by name


 
“Creator

Maker

Life-Sustainer
                   
Comforter

Healer

My Redeemer
                   


LORD and King

Beginning and the End

I Am



Yes, I Am”




I Am, Nicole Nordeman





He’s the only One Who goes all the way with us.

https://www.intentionalkingdomliving.com/283/

Good Morning!

I thought I should share some thoughts-thus-far on the spending fast.  I only have two days left, so I wanna give you a pulse on how it’s going.

I will not share details of a fail I had.  Other than it included a marked-down pastry and not sharing.

But.  Yesterday I had a victory.  I went down the HBA aisle to get some deodorant (because this fast isn’t about punishing others) and instinctively grabbed a couple of cheap shampoos (because the 4 already in my shower aren’t enough).  Then I remembered the fast, and put them back on the shelf.  Wasn’t a big thing.  Wasn’t even hard.  Win!

I wanna cut my own hair off.  When it’s past the point of looking decent in a hair clip, tis time for a chop. 

Also: Dan insisted on taking us out for a late Mother’s Day dinner over the weekend.  I kicked and screamed and inhaled chips and salsa.  It was a nice outing.

Other than that, not much to report. 

I’ve been praying this week for a training that has had a big impact on my life personally.  The volunteer trainers are focusing on heart issues in students as they prepare to invest their summers internationally. 

It’s a great reminder why I want to be intentional with finances.  There are so many in this world who, despite the internet and Hollywood and McDonald’s, have no incarnational witness of Jesus or the living Word in their culture and language.

Foster says, “Nothing can motivate us to simplify our lifestyle more than a clear understanding of our responsibilities to the many ‘hidden cultures’ of the earth that have no Christian witness.”

And Alcorn:

“I’m convinced God’s raised us up, with all our wealth, to help fulfill the great commission…There is no greater way to invest our money in eternity than in the cause of world missions.”

I pray not buying $2 off-brand shampoo can somehow turn into the benefit of my friends on the other side of the globe and their eternal destiny.

Lord Jesus, move this summer for Your glory!

“I looked again.

I saw a huge crowd, too huge to count.

Everyone was there—all nations and tribes, all races and languages.

And they were standing, dressed in white robes and waving palm branches, standing before the Throne and the Lamb and heartily singing:

https://www.intentionalkingdomliving.com/285/

We are dog-sitting this week.

It was my man’s idea.

This is exciting.

Her name is Gracie and she’s wonderful.  Well trained.  Obedient. Cuddly.

She followed Dan yesterday, then hopped up in his lap.  He looked at me and goes, “Okay, maybe we need a dog.”

Don’t ever be fooled about my man.  He would do anything for his family.

I think a dog could be great.  Notice I didn’t say a puppy.  I seriously don’t want to potty train one more living thing.

But a nice, trained dog from the Humane Society?  I think we could all get on board.

I’m not a big fan of responsibility, but waking up to that furry face this morning was delightful.  It may be worth it.

It made me think of the one mommy-type book Beth Moore wrote.  She was talking about a stray one of their children talked her into letting stay.   It made me smile today:

“I don’t want to brag, so I’ll just try to stay with the facts.  Sunny became the perfect dog…Even people who hate dogs love Sunny.  She’s never demanding.  She’s always attentive.  She sits on my feet while I do dishes.  If I dig in the garden, she digs in the garden too…

These days Sunny is my best friend…She’s right beside me to relate no matter what mood happens to have overtaken me…If I’m sick, she lies on the end of the bed like she’s nearly dead.  If I’m sad, she sits beside me and sighs until I’m over it.  If I keep crying, she finally turns to me abruptly and licks me right on the face.  It gets a laugh out of me every time.  If I’m mad, she barks like the dickens.  If I’m anxious, she’ll leave a path in the carpet from pacing back and forth.  If I’m happy, she wags everything from her shoulders back.

Say what you want, but that kind of friend works for me every time.  A cynic can make fun of me…but I’m going to tell you what I think.  I think God planted that silly dog on our front porch eight or so years ago…

Like most of you, I have a complicated life.  Lots of demands.  Unimaginable stresses at times.  People share things with me that could make a person unable to sleep at night.  Life can take a lot out of a soul.  Every once in a while God grants you something that just gives. 

That’s my Sunny.”

https://www.intentionalkingdomliving.com/286/

Whew.  It’s been like a pep rally around here.

I like a good pep rally.  My man does, too.  But then he’s right back into practicalities.  That’s why he’s so good for me. 

Been thinking about this verse:

“Do not be deceived:  God cannot be mocked.  A man reaps what he sows.  The one who sows to please his sinful nature, from that nature will reap destruction; the one who sows to please the Spirit, from that Spirit will reap eternal life.”  (Galations 6:7&8)

And this one from our group’s study:

“Sow for yourselves righteousness,

Reap the fruit of unfailing love,

And break up your unplowed ground;

For it is time to seek the LORD,

Until he comes

And showers righteousness

On you.”

(Hosea 10:12)

I’ve been reaping what I’ve sown (or not sown) in a couple of areas. 

On the way to my class yesterday, I told God how I haven’t been doing anything extra to learn some new moves to keep the Low Impact class fresh for those ladies.  Nothing.  Then my supervisor showed up on a whim to evaluate me.  It went fine.  But after class she mentioned I should learn a few more steps to keep it fresh.

Gulp.

I hear You, God.

Maybe doesn’t seem like a huge deal.  But I want to love those women well and put forth excellent effort in my job.

So there’s that.

Then I’ve had this nagging feeling about how the boys have had too much screen time lately.  Mostly because I’ve had too much screen time lately.  So been convicted about pouring forth my best energies into those two little souls. 

And, finally, in light of all this money & giving talk:

“Paul said,

‘I do not mean that others should be eased and you burdened, but that as a matter of equality your abundance at the present time should supply their want, so that their abundance may supply their want, that there may be equality.  (2 Cor 8: 13-14, emphasis added)

What an astonishing principle for modern ears.  In essence, Paul is suggesting a certain economic balance among the Christian community. 

Now Paul is not seeking some kind of precise financial leveling.  Gospel liberty was too deeply embedded within him for such pharisaical gymnastics.  But he is pointing to a generosity of life that cannot rest in abundance while others suffer in need…

….  But  …….

Grace and latitude should mark our relationships.  All too often we can injure each other unduly in our zeal for justice and truth and righteousness.  The spirit of condemnation can creep into our relationships terribly subtly.  We can begin to look at each other’s possessions with a mental calculator. 

But there is a more excellent way:

We simply need to be with one another, loving, supporting, caring. 

Of course we live and speak the truth as it has been given to us, but the business of straightening each other out belongs to God, not us.”

Freedom of Simplicity, pgs. 189, 190, 193

Anyway, all this to say:

God’s Word is our standard.  The Holy Spirit is our guide. 

Let’s listen to Him, knowing He will never direct us to something that is contrary to His beautiful, flawless, revealed Word.

Have a great day!

https://www.intentionalkingdomliving.com/287/