I am coming out of a year of unparalleled transition. Nothing seems untouched. Relationships, circumstances, surroundings – everything changed. I held on for dear life to anything standing still. One morning on my way to work, I made the same stop I had made for 18 months: my favorite little coffee shop. I pranced in and made my usual order: “a banana nut bagel with plain cream cheese, please.” The server looked at me cheerfully and said, “We’re not carrying that kind anymore. Is there something else I can get you today?”

I stood stunned with my eyebrows pinned like two barrettes to my hairline. I must have been in shock for some time because the person behined me finally bumped me out of the way providing all I needed to burst into tears. As I walked out to the car, I looked up and inquired, “Could I have one thing around this place I can count on?!”

As I got in the car, I sensed the Father speak His Word to my heart. “Beth, I will never leave you nor will I ever forsake you.”

-Breaking Free

We have such tendency toward extremes. We find security in “always” and “nevers.” People crave a human worth worshipping. Our deep need for unfailing love is so cavernous, when someone seems to fill it, we feel compelled to worship him or her. We are wise not to try to deliver. – Beth Moore

Worship is an activity of the human soul. Not only do all people worship, but they worship all the time. Worship isn’t just a Sunday thing. It’s an all-the-time thing.

So how do you know where and what you worship?

It’s easy. You simply follow the trail of your time, your affection, your energy, your money, and your allegiance. At the end of the trail you’ll find a throne; and whatever, or whomever, is on that throne is what’s of highest value to you. On that throne is what you worship.

Sure, not too many of us walk around saying, ‘I worship my stuff. I worhip my job. I worship this pleasure. I worship her. I worship my body. I worship me!’

But the trail never lies. We may say we value this thing or that thing more than any other, but the volume of our actions speaks louder than our words.

We are continually making decisions based on what we value most.

– Louie Giglio

I’ve never forgotten this little rant on frugality…

http://www.commonsensewithmoney.com/2008/10/please-dont-call-me-cheap/

As high as the heavens are above the earth, so great is Your love for those who fear You. Ps103

You are my God and I am among the sheep of Your pasture, the flock under Your care. Ps95

Help me never to be afraid; I am worth far more to You than many sparrows. Luke12

Though You bring grief, You will show compassion, so great is Your unfailing love. Lam3

You saved me, not because of righteous things I had done, but because of Your mercy. Titus3

You broke the bars of my yoke and enabled me to walk with my head held high. Lev26

You will fulfill Your purpose for me. Ps138

You Who called me will Yourself restore me and make me strong, firm and steadfast. 1Pet5 (Peter, Mr. Deny-Him-Three-Times, would know – am I right?)

I am not ashamed. For I know Whom I have believed, and am convinced You are able to guard what I have entrusted to You for that day. 2Tim1

Caden inherited a big Tonka truck from his buddy who moved. Don’t tell me 2-year-olds aren’t smart. He’s figured out how to position that stupid truck near the cabinet, climb on top of it, and reach whatever it was he wanted. Which this morning meant Halloween candy. For breakfast. Not bad, my son. Not bad.

The night before our wedding, after hanging out with friends who live in Hawaii and friends from high school and family and friends from college, my man goes, “I hope in heaven, we get to have a house next to all these guys.” (Yes, I got a good one.)

This morning we moved out our friends. We’ve (literally) been all over the world the last four years. They’ve been our one constant. Aside from our One Constant. We’ve seen each other through the ugliest character issues surfacing through culture shock (if you’re reading this, guys, I’m talking about my issues 😉 ), our first born boys, postpartum (the women had some moments afterwards too), living in an apartment together for 6 weeks in a foreign country with one wife on bedrest and the other one with a screaming, colicky infant (and we still like each other!), visa dramas, “church” – just the four of us with an iPod-, friends’ deaths, family’s surgeries, family’s deaths, family’s transplants, families driving us crazy, driving each other crazy, figuring out how to be parents and, well, you get the idea.

Yes, I’ve cried a lot the last few weeks. And been homesick for the area they get to return to. But mostly I’m just excited for them. That’s from Him. I don’t care about other people that much on my own. I’m not that nice.

But it is hard. What a void. Caden’s best buddy, hands down. Other friends don’t even come close.

*Sigh.* No, this isn’t heaven. But it’s coming. And until then, we are here for a reason. And most of that has to do with joining Him in making sure other people are in heaven, too. Worth it.

Still, this is the quote in my heart right this moment:

“Intimacy with God grows through sharing every realm of experience. I’ve wept bitterly with Him. I’ve screamed in frustration. Sometimes I thought He was going to break my heart in two. But I’ve also laughed out loud with Him. Wept with unspeakable joy. Left the chair and gone to my knees in awe. Squealed with excitement.

I have been to every extremity and back with God. But if I had to define my relationship with Him by one general statement, I would tell you that He is the absolute joy of my life. I don’t just love Him. I love loving Him. Surrendering my heart to Him has not been a sacrifice. I don’t know any other way to say it: He works for me.

I am hesitant to say all of this because I would be sickened to think I might sound proud of my relationship with God. Please hear my heart when I tell you that the greatest joy in my life is the very thing I have deserved least. I consider the ability to love Him and enjoy Him an absolute gift of grace…one He will gladly extend to anyone who offers Him her whole heart.”

– Breaking Free

We will pray for you all the time, guys. Write us all the funny stuff. And remember to shove food down their throats.

The boy is sleeping a long time. Means more blog posts…

“He cuts off every branch in me that bears no fruit, while every branch that does bear fruit he prunes so that it will be even more fruitful” (John 15:2)

If you are a true follower of Jesus Christ, I bet you sometimes feel like God is picking on you. Have you ever exclaimed in exasperation, “God never lets me get away with anything”? Have you ever noticed that God seems particularly jealous with you? That He extracts from your life mindless and meaningless activities that He seems to “put up with” in other believers’ lives? That, dear one, is because you have proved to be a cooperative fruit-bearing child and He knows He has a prime branch through whom He can be all the more glorified…

I believe this verse suggests that God works all the harder on the child that is producing fruit so he or she will produce even more…

God desires for those who bear fruit to bear more fruit and those who bear more fruit to bear much fruit!

To the best of your biblical undersanding, based on an abiding sense of God’s presence and pleasure as opposed to numbers and notoriety, where do you think you may presently be on a scale from no apparent fruit, to some fruit, then more fruit, and finally to much fruit?

The pickier we let Him be with us, the more productive He will be through us. When all is said and done and we are living in heaven, all that will matter is whether or not our lives glorified God…

The fact of the matter is that we have been called to lives of obedience. Yes, the grace of God covers our sins as we trust in Christ’s finished work on the cross. But we will not bear much fruit without obedience to the Father’s will. According to John 15:10, if we don’t walk closely to Him in obedience, we will never draw near enough to abide in His love. He loves us no matter what we do, but we will not be able to pitch our spiritual tents in His presence when we’re disobedient.

Does this sound like a life of just serving and sacrificing? Then you’d better read John 15:11 again. Jesus said, ‘I have told you this so that my joy may be in you and that your joy may be complete.’ God longs to bless us with abundant life and joy. And not just any joy – Christ’s joy! Perfect, full, magnetic, and contagious!

God doesn’t just have more for you. He has much. Much love. Much fruit. Much joy. And the God of the universe derives much glory from one measly mortal. Who can beat a deal like that?”

– The Beloved Disciple. I loved learning about Jesus’s heart buddy, John

It’s naptime, so little man is in bed. The first thing I read? Francine Rivers’ novella on the prophet Amos. Listen as she describes what a shepherd is like…

“They were coming.

They moved swiftly, keeping low to the ground…Amos didn’t have to see them to know the enemy was closing in. Three sheep were missing – the same stubborn dam who so frequently troubled him, and her twin lambs. He must act quickly.

Calling to his flock, he watched them race toward him. They sensed his urgency and follwed him into the fold. Assured of their safety, he was free now to go after the lost ones.

A lamb bleated…the foolish dam remained intent upon having her own way. Rather than stay in the green pastures to which he led her, she continued to choose brambles and brush.

Amos saw the wolves. Snarling, the wolf advanced in a low crouch, hackles raised…Amos hurled his club, and struck it hard in the hip. With a cry of pain, the wolf limped into the brush and disappeared.

The baby lamb lay still. Amos lifted it tenderly, examining it. Shock and fear had killed it.

He sighed heavily. How many times had this dam led others into danger? How many times had he rescued her, only to have to hunt her down again? He cared deeply for all his sheep, even this dam who habitually caused trouble. But he could not allow her to go on leading others into the jaws of predators.

The dam, now safe, moved stiff-necked, ruminating as she gazed once at Amos before heading toward the brush again. Shaking his head, Amos laid the dead lamb on the ground, unsheathed his knife, and went after her.

When the deed was done, Amos felt only sorrow. If only she had stayed close to him, he would not have found it necessary to end her life for the sake of the others.

He carried the surviving twin back to the fold…

Amos spotted the remaining twin lamb near some bushes. As he approached, he saw its wool had snagged in a thornbush. One hard tug, and the lamb could have freed itself, but it was not in his nature to do so. Instead, the animal would stand still until rescue came – or a predator, eager to make a meal of him…

The lamb had learned his mother’s bad habits…

“It’s this or death, little one.” Amos released the stone, striking the lamb in the front leg, just above the knee…

Tears burning, Amos went to the wounded lamb and knelt. “I am here, little one. I would rather wound you myself than see you come to greater harm.” He knew after a gentle examination that the leg was broken, but not shattered. It would heal. “I know I hurt you, but better you suffer an injury that will heal than become dinner for a prowling lion.” He ran his hand gently over the lamb’s head. “You will learn to stay close to me where you’re safe.” He cupped the lamb’s head and breathed into its face. “No struggling or you will cause yourself more pain.” He gently lifted the lamb onto his shoulders and carried him back to the flock.”

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“‘The LORD is my Shepherd, I shall not want.’ If I really believe that, I will know a life of perfect rest.” – Kay Arthur

Big blog day. This isn’t a “frugal blog” because. Well, why reinvent the wheel? And I’d get bored after awhile.

But have you seen this?

http://thegroceryweekly.blogspot.com/2009/10/50-off-payless-purchase.html

… but I’m thinking 3 pieces of bacon a day might catch up with me?